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Tag: Sam Vaknin

FREE BOOKS at Vaknin-Rangelovska Foundation

The Vaknin-Rangelovska Foundation offers six free downloadable books covering topics such as narcissistic abuse, psychological recovery, and revolutionary theories in physics, with support available for authors to publish expansions of Sandaknin’s work. The foundation also sponsors free seminars, lectures, interviews, and documentary participations to promote education in psychology, economics, and physics. Authors retain 100% of the income from published works, while the foundation manages all publishing and marketing processes at no cost to them.

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21.09.2025

Solastalgia: Healing Shared Fantasy, Narcissistic Abuse

Sam Vaknin detailed the concept of narcissistic abuse as creating a dystopian, alienating environment that sets victims up for failure and emotional distress, coining the term “solstalgia” to describe the unique psychological pain caused by such oppressive environments. He related solstalgia, originally defined as distress from environmental changes, to the toxic psychosocial dynamics within narcissistic relationships, emphasizing its impact on mental health and the potential for therapeutic intervention. The discussion highlighted recent research on solstalgia’s links to complex trauma and proposed expanding its application beyond environmental issues to better understand and treat victims of narcissistic abuse.

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20.09.2025

How to Hatch in Narcissist’s Mind: Internal to External Object

Sam Vaknin explained that narcissists perceive others not as separate external entities but as internal objects or avatars within their own minds, using primitive defenses such as projection and splitting internally on these representations rather than on the actual people. He emphasized that challenging a narcissist’s internal object through asserting personal autonomy, disagreeing, or maintaining external relationships can provoke aggression but is essential to affirm one’s separateness and reality. Ultimately, Vaknin advised that recognizing this dynamic helps in coping with narcissists, as attempts to assert external reality can disrupt the narcissist’s fantasy but may risk the relationship.

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19.09.2025

Sam and Lidija: Parents of Narcissistic Abuse Field (with J.S. Wolfe)

In this in-depth discussion, Sam Vaknin and Lydia Rangalowska explored the complexities of narcissistic personality disorder, including its origins, emotional dynamics, and impact on relationships, emphasizing the internalized nature of narcissistic perceptions and behaviors. They highlighted the challenges faced by partners of narcissists, the interplay between different personality disorders, and the psychological mechanisms narcissists use to manipulate and sustain their distorted self-concept. The conversation also addressed misconceptions about empathy, the fluidity of personality disorders, and the difficulties in individuation for those enmeshed with narcissistic parents.

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18.09.2025

Parentified Child’s Insecure Attachment: Internal Parents, Rebirth, Hyperintrojection

The speaker discussed the complex insecure attachment psychological dynamics of parentified children, explaining how insecure, regressed parents often infantilize themselves and delegate parental responsibilities to their children, causing these children to assume caregiving roles both externally and internally throughout their lives. They highlighted how even mentally healthy parents can regress due to trauma or childbirth, leading to similar parentification processes. The discussion emphasized the long-lasting effects on attachment styles, internal family systems, and the challenges parentified children face in forming secure relationships and object constancy. Hyperintrojection

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16.09.2025

Being Alone is Normal, Socializing is Coercive (Loneliness Industry Podcast)

Professor Sam Vaknin discussed how human loneliness, being alone is an inherent condition stemming from the existential trauma of separateness experienced through the gaze of others, with modern technology enabling a choice to embrace isolation via artificial interactions like social media. He emphasized that this technological shift is intentional and systematically discourages genuine intimacy, leading to widespread societal atomization, and that individuals differ in their ability to create and maintain fantasy as a coping mechanism to manage this solitude. The conversation also explored the psychological impacts of narcissism and fantasy on human connection, highlighting the complex interplay between personal choice, societal structures, and technological influences on loneliness and social detachment.

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16.09.2025

Is There Good Narcissism? (The Nerve with Maureen Callahan)

The speaker discussed the concept of narcissism, emphasizing that a certain degree of narcissism is natural and necessary for healthy self-esteem, but can become pathological and harmful. They explained the narcissist’s behavior, awareness of their impact, and the dynamic of the “fantastic space” or fantasy world narcissists create to manipulate their victims, highlighting the transition from idealization to devaluation. The conversation also covered the challenges in treating narcissistic personality disorder and the psychological effects on victims, concluding that awareness often arises when the narcissist’s idealization phase abruptly shifts to devaluation.

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15.09.2025

Recognize Borderline Personality Disorder in Women and Mothers (The Nerve with Maureen Callahan)

The discussion focused on defining borderline personality disorder (BPD) through key traits such as innate emptiness, emotional dysregulation, suicidal ideation, chronic anger, intense and unstable relationships, and twin anxieties of abandonment and engulfment. It highlighted that not all individuals with BPD exhibit every trait, using personal childhood examples to illustrate behaviors like sudden rage and splitting within family dynamics. The complexity of BPD was emphasized, particularly the ongoing internal conflicts and relational challenges experienced by those affected.

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15.09.2025

Bipolar Disorders Not Borderline Personality Disorder!

The discussion centered on distinguishing between bipolar disorder and borderline personality disorder (BPD), emphasizing that bipolar mood cycles are long and predictable, while BPD mood shifts are rapid and unpredictable. The impact of a borderline mother on a child was highlighted, particularly the child’s internalization of blame and the inability to form a secure mental model of the mother’s behavior, leading to lasting emotional challenges. Personal reflections on the speaker’s own borderline mother illustrated how early trauma and lack of support contributed to her condition and the family’s coping dynamics.

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12.09.2025

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