Tag: Twin Anxieties

Make Narcissist FEAR YOU: Abandonment Anxiety, Annihilation Dread (Twin Anxieties)

In this video, Sam Vaknin explains the narcissist’s fear of abandonment, highlighting the paradox where narcissists both dread abandonment by their idealized objects yet push others away during the devaluation phase due to their twin anxieties of abandonment and annihilation. He elaborates on how these anxieties influence narcissistic behavior and offers strategies to leverage the abandonment anxiety in the idealization phase through threats of leaving, while using implied power to deter abuse during the devaluation phase. Vaknin emphasizes that understanding these dynamics can help those involved with narcissists manage or mitigate abuse, although his primary recommendation remains to cut contact if possible.

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Recognize Borderline Personality Disorder in Women and Mothers (The Nerve with Maureen Callahan)

The discussion focused on defining borderline personality disorder (BPD) through key traits such as innate emptiness, emotional dysregulation, suicidal ideation, chronic anger, intense and unstable relationships, and twin anxieties of abandonment and engulfment. It highlighted that not all individuals with BPD exhibit every trait, using personal childhood examples to illustrate behaviors like sudden rage and splitting within family dynamics. The complexity of BPD was emphasized, particularly the ongoing internal conflicts and relational challenges experienced by those affected.

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