Tag: Narcissistic Self-Concept

“Bad” Relationships Are Opportunities (with Daria Zukowska, Clinical Psychologist)

Professor Sam Vaknin discussed dysfunctional relationships and reframed them as learning opportunities rather than “lost time,” emphasizing that growth requires emotional insight and embodiment in addition to cognitive understanding. He explained that negative self-concept arises from internalized hostile voices, can be countered by developing an authentic, supportive inner voice, and advised rebuilding trust slowly—testing partners and first reestablishing trust in oneself. He also noted that healthy relationships accept partners as they are and allow freedom and outside enrichment, and warned against pursuing relationships compulsively. “Bad” Relationships Are Opportunities (with Daria Zukowska, Clinical Psychologist)

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Violent Innocence of Narcissist’s Victimhood (Passive-aggression)

In this video, Sam Vaknin discussed the concept of “violent innocence,” a psychological defense mechanism common in narcissists, where individuals cause harm while denying responsibility and insisting on their moral superiority. He explained how covert narcissists exhibit passive aggression through behaviors like gaslighting, procrastination, and performative compliance or obnoxiousness, all while maintaining a self-concept of being good and blameless. The discussion highlighted the harmful effects of violent innocence on victims and society, emphasizing narcissists’ denial, lack of self-awareness, and resistance to growth or accountability. Violent Innocence of Narcissist’s Victimhood (Passive-aggression)

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