Tag: Narcissistic Mortification

Narcissist’s Fantasy Not About YOU, Psychopath’s Is (Collateral Victimhood)

In this video, San Vaknin clarified the distinction between narcissistic and psychopathic fantasies, emphasizing that narcissistic fantasies revolve around the narcissist’s grandiose self-concept and needs, while psychopathic fantasies focus on fulfilling the victim’s desires. He explained that narcissists are impaired in reality testing due to their reliance on delusional fantasies that combine factual elements inaccurately, leading to dissociation and self-supply defenses. The discussion highlighted that narcissists genuinely believe their fantasies and seek to induct others into these self-centered realities, contrasting with psychopaths who manipulate victims to achieve pragmatic goals. Narcissist’s Fantasy Not About YOU, Psychopath’s Is (Collateral Victimhood)

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Narcissist: When Defenses Crumble, Shame Overwhelms: Narcissistic Mortification, Pt. 2 (Compilation)

In this comprehensive discussion, Sam Vaknin explains narcissistic motification as a severe psychological event distinct from narcissistic injury, characterized by public humiliation that dismantles the narcissist’s defenses and leads to profound shame, grief, and potential suicidal ideation. He describes the stages following motification, including internal and external attributions of blame, and how these affect the narcissist’s behavior, often resulting in vindictive actions to restore grandiosity. Additionally, Vaknin explores the dynamics of narcissistic relationships, highlighting key behaviors such as hoovering, approach-avoidance cycles, and the complex interplay of intimacy, control, and abandonment within shared fantasies.

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When YOU Discard the Narcissist FIRST

Sam Vaknin explained the psychological effects on a narcissist when they are discarded by a partner before they have the chance to devalue and discard the other person, highlighting the resulting narcissistic injury or mortification. He detailed the narcissist’s subsequent reactions, including emotional dysregulation, abandonment anxiety, dissociation, and often coercive efforts to restore the shared fantasy through hoovering or replacement relationships. The discussion emphasized the narcissist’s internal struggle with self-image, grief over the lost relationship, and the repetitive cycle of idealization, devaluation, and discard with new partners.

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