Tag: Abandonment Anxiety

10 Signs: YOU are Broken, Damaged, Scarred

Sam Vaknin discusses the psychological patterns and clinical features common among damaged and broken individuals, emphasizing the impacts of trauma, mistrust, emotional detachment, and difficulties with intimacy and boundaries. He highlights defense mechanisms such as hypervigilance, emotional numbness, conflict avoidance, perfectionism, and the harsh inner critic, explaining how these behaviors serve as survival strategies but ultimately hinder healthy relationships. Vaknin encourages therapy and self-awareness to overcome these patterns, promoting the acceptance of inherent self-worth independent of achievements or others’ approval. 10 Signs: YOU are Broken, Damaged, Scarred

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When YOU Discard the Narcissist FIRST

Sam Vaknin explained the psychological effects on a narcissist when they are discarded by a partner before they have the chance to devalue and discard the other person, highlighting the resulting narcissistic injury or mortification. He detailed the narcissist’s subsequent reactions, including emotional dysregulation, abandonment anxiety, dissociation, and often coercive efforts to restore the shared fantasy through hoovering or replacement relationships. The discussion emphasized the narcissist’s internal struggle with self-image, grief over the lost relationship, and the repetitive cycle of idealization, devaluation, and discard with new partners.

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