Overt+Covert Narcissist in One Person: Self-supply (44:17), Binary Narcissism

1. Introduction to the Concept of Self and Narcissism

• The speaker challenges the traditional psychological notion of a unitary self, suggesting that humans consist of multiple sub-personalities or self-states that interact internally and collectively form identity [00:00].
• Psychology’s turn towards experimental methods and laboratory studies resulted in alienation from real human relational experiences [06:00].
• The self is viewed as a relational outcome shaped by lifelong interactions with others, opposing the isolated self-model [02:50].

2. Internal Self-States and Operating System Model

• New psychological models propose that the self operates like an internal system or operating system that selects which self-state (sub-personality) emerges depending on external and internal stimuli [09:00].
• Self-states share a common database of memories, allowing fluid but stable identity core that organizes and guides which self-state is active [11:30].
• Selection of the active self-state aims to maximize self-efficacy—producing favorable outcomes in the individual’s environment [13:50].

3. Dynamics of Self-States in Mental Illness

• In mental illness (e.g., borderline or narcissistic personality disorders), self-states shift rapidly due to dysregulation caused by overwhelming stimuli [14:40].
• Example: Borderline personality disorder features shifts from vulnerable to psychopathic sub-states to cope with threats like humiliation or abandonment [15:40].

4. System of Residuals: Coexistence of Multiple Self-States

• When all available self-states are equally ineffective, the system may maintain multiple self-states simultaneously, forming a “system of residuals” or binary system with two or more sub-personalities coexisting [19:30].
• This leads to internal dissonance and conflict due to opposing self-states, analogous to multiple captains steering a ship simultaneously [21:20].

5. Transition Between Narcissistic Subtypes and Collapsed Bridges

• People can transition between personality disorders or subtypes (e.g., overt to covert narcissism) using a “collapsed bridge” state [22:50].
• Failure to fully transition results in a binary system where both overt and covert narcissistic self-states exist simultaneously but are equally incompetent at securing narcissistic supply [24:40].
• This binary coexistence perpetuates internal conflict and self-sabotage, as the overt state despises and attacks the covert state while the covert state envies and undermines the overt [27:00].

6. Manifestation of Internal Conflict and Aggression

• Aggression flows between self-states: overt state attacks covert state, which recycles aggression inwardly as depression or outwardly as sadistic fantasies [31:10].
• The covert state employs fantasy defenses, expressing aggression primarily in imagined scenarios rather than real interactions [33:25].

7. Sublimatory Channels for Aggression and Narcissistic Supply

• Four internal “voices” or sublimatory channels allow expression and transformation of aggressive energy within the binary system:
  • Judgmental contemptuous voice: overt dominance aggressiveness [36:00].
  • Victorious voice: self-perceived uniqueness by both states [38:00].
  • Merciful empathic voice: ostentatious generosity, mainly overt [39:30].
  • Educational voice: promotes learning and teaching, fostering humility and empathy; most socially acceptable and healing channel [41:00].

8. Self-Supply and Healing Potential of the Binary System

• The binary system generates pathological self-supply through internal conflict (e.g., overt humiliates covert) but also has potential for therapeutic transformation [43:40].
• Educational sublimatory channel converts grandiosity into healthy self-esteem via socially approved behaviors like learning and teaching, encouraging honest communication and empathy [45:20].
• Because neither self-state dominates, resistance to insight and change is reduced, rendering this system a unique opportunity for healing [46:45].

9. Therapeutic Implications and Cold Therapy

• Therapeutic interventions might intentionally induce a binary system to lower defenses and open narcissists to change by exploiting their internal conflict and vulnerabilities [48:00].
• Cold therapy may re-traumatize or induce collapse, forcing patients to maintain multiple self-states simultaneously, creating an opportunity to integrate these states via the educational sublimatory channel [49:00].
• Achieving narcissist vulnerability and humility through dissonance and inner turmoil is critical for therapeutic progress [50:30].

This comprehensive summary covers the key themes and topics addressed in the meeting about the psychology of narcissism, self-states, and the system of residuals, including diagnostic insights and therapeutic strategies.